Practical Management Series: Carnegie’s Laws of Influence
Shamelessly, I forgot the inspiration for this “Practical Management” series. It was some from a management book. I will eventually come around and update this post with his name. It is also no coincidence that this series is essentially about management books, with a focus on applying them. On How to Put Them into Practice.
The examples I share may be tailored to the IT Audit discipline. However, I want these posts to be useful to anyone in any profession. The examples can be easily re-contextualized to suit any profession. Just use your imagination and apply the concepts to your line of work. The key takeaway here is that you strategically plan and apply the practices to the context of your work, and important interactions in your work responsibilities. Plan ahead and use the principles within the plan.
For the first post in this series, we will be exploring application of Dale Carnegie’s work, “How to Win Friends and Influence People”.
About the Book: Dale Carnegie's "How to Win Friends and Influence People" offers timeless principles on interpersonal skills and their impact on influencing people in our lives. Influence is an important component in our work and needs to be applied strategically. For some situations we can influence “on our feet”, and the more you apply these principles, the more “on your feet” skills you will have. Complex situations averse to change may require a strategic and persistent approach across multiple layers of an organization. So, the art of influence needs to be part of your professional toolbox, and should be strategically applied daily. Practice. Practice. Practice.
Below are examples that blend Carnegie's principles (in bold) and how an Auditor can a apply them, aiming to engage, persuade, and foster positive change:
Smile: Rather obvious, but hey, we are human. If you're having a bad day, remind yourself to begin a meeting with a smile, particularly important meetings where you need to apply influence. It’s a simple thing, and gives a leg up on implementing other Carnegie principles. If you're kicking off an audit, smile. If you're obtaining agreements to make improvements, smile.
Remember That a Person’s Name is to That Person the Sweetest Sound: Names are important. Anticipate the people you will likely speak with, and learn their names prior to applying influence. Greet them by name, and say it sincerely. It builds connection, and helps pull some attention. And throughout the application of other principles, name names. For example, personalize the audit story by mentioning individuals who contributed positively, and use that to build rapport, appreciation, and interest. Its an important foundation for applying other principles of influence. People love hearing their names in a positive light. Use this power to your advantage.
Make the Other Person Feel Important – And Do It Sincerely: Use regular touchpoint, or formal audit meetings to highlight a persons, and department's role in the company's success before discussing how audit can help further enhance their contribution. Lift them up, and show them you know their purpose and its importance. It builds partnership, teamwork, and a feeling of common purpose, important cultural and environmental variables necessary for further application of effective influence.
Begin in a Friendly Way: Don’t just jump into calling out problems and solutions. Auditors can start meetings with a positive story about the department's past achievements to create a friendly atmosphere. Use prior experiences to remind people of positive outcomes. Atmosphere is key here. Establish an atmosphere of collaboration and shared purpose.
Show Genuine Interest in People: Take the time to learn about people need to influence. Leverage available resources. Also use your time with them to ask questions that uncover their goals, values, and challenges. When you know these things, use the information when applying influence. For example, let’s say an auditor uncovers an efficiency issue. Instead of explaining the issue directly, the audit can begin by praising the audit stakeholder team, the value they provide to the firm, and their dedication and hard work. Then the auditor can align the issue with stakeholder goals and value, increasing the likelihood that the recommendation will be considered.
Let the Other Person Do a Great Deal of the Talking: I like to use the term “Seek to Understand, Before Seeking to be Understood”. Some people love to talk, and if they start the conversation, sit back and listen. LEARN. Use these learnings to determine strategies and approaches to influence. Sprinkle in other principles of influence into the dialogue. A key thing to avoid here is a mindset of hi-jacking the direction. For example, if a target of influence is ranting about interdepartmental challenges, or maybe an exciting update about strategic direction, let them say it and show understanding. DO NOT disrupt to the point that they feel cut off. For more, see next principle.
Be a Good Listener: Feels a little duplicative to #6. But the re-iteration is worth it. People like to talk. You have to be a good prompt for that (use principle 1). Ask questions. Give them the floor. Allow them to open up to you. Let them complain and get things off their chest. It can reveal very useful information. What’s important to them? What’s a challenge for them? Where do they need help? Also, after you do share an idea, or position, ask them how they feel about it. Listen more. As you navigate the conversation, work in the other principles. Remember, you like this person, you care for their success, you want their success, so sit back and listen.
Give Honest, Sincere Appreciation: People need to feel appreciated. It builds on the above foundations. For example, start a presentation on audit findings by acknowledging the hard work and improvements the department has made since the last audit, setting a positive tone. Recap and remind them of successful collaborations from earlier audits. Acknowledge and commend them on other achievements. Thank them for their engagement in the process. Make them feel appreciated.
Arouse in the Other Person an Eager Want: This is where the application of influence gets more active. Can you get this person to want this change? This proposal? To take ownership of a problem? You have to really think backwards from their perspective. What are their goals, strategies, and how does your recommendation enable their success? Think! Get Imaginative. For example, an IT Security Auditor can align a recommendation to a key element of the Cybersecurity Strategy. Leverage the knowledge you gained from your genuine interest. What are the 3 most important goals of your stakeholder? From there, identify and link audit goals and findings to those goals, and demonstrate how your work as an auditor can enable success on their goals.
Talk in Terms of the Other Person’s Interests: A very useful principle as your strategize your campaign of influence. Identify how your goals align to their goals. To the goals of the firm. Emphasize how the outcome you want may be beneficial to others. It’s a powerful place to begin the campaign. For example, in the context of Audit, frame audit findings in a way that directly relates to the stakeholders’ goals, such as cost savings, process improvements, or reduced risks.
Get the Other Person Saying “Yes, Yes” Immediately: Also a more active principles that requires planning. This approach is about using a conversational style that leads the target of influence into the conversations from the context of one of their goals, and prompts them to a mindset of agreement, starting with some smaller agreements, and moving up to other agreements you need to obtain. For example, introduce an audit finding by first agreeing on common goals and values (“we both understand the importance of this goal”, “yes”, “we both want to make sure we can measure progress”, “yes”., leading to a more constructive conversation towards the main goal of your influence.
Dramatize Your Ideas: Tell stories. This concept of telling stories has grown a lot over the last several years. There are whole books about practical storytelling in our daily lives. Carnegie knew back then, tell stories. Use vivid storytelling to illustrate the potential impact of audit findings, making them more compelling and urgent to address. I have see some amazing storytellers in my career. They use stories to set clear visions, and well as to convey clear dangers or challenges ahead if something is not done. But facts are important here as well. This is not an exercise in fiction. So your stories have to include facts, and stories with believable facts are incredibly powerful at influence.
Let the Other Person Feel That the Idea is His or Hers: You need to drop your pride for this one. But there are times where this approach is necessary. Some people have personalities where they are very averse to change. It doesn’t mean they aren’t good at what they do. They just have certain mental habits that require them to be the originator of ideas. As an influencer, you need to be OK with this. Your goal is to drive a certain change, and part of that is sacrificing credit for the sake of change. For example, an auditor can present audit recommendations by framing them as enhancements to ideas previously suggested by the stakeholder team. It a common practice in audit shops and it helps get the desired outcome.
Be Sympathetic With the Other Person’s Ideas and Desires: You can’t ignore other peoples views, adjustments, or disagreements to your ideas. They may have ideas that improve on yours. You have to consider those as part of the dialogue, and larger influence strategy. Sometimes you can adjust your recommendation during the conversation and build a sense of collaboration on implementing the idea.
Show Respect for the Other Person’s Opinions: Show them you understand, particularly if it’s a hard disagreement. Seek to understand, and show respect and consideration for them. Sometimes you may fully agree with them. Other times you may not agree with them, but you must still show respect for it. It’s not necessarily the end of the campaign of influence. Tell them you will take it back and think about it. It give you time to also strategize on your next moves for influencing.
Appeal to the Nobler Motives: Sometimes you need to consider the larger context of an area you are trying to influence. For example, if you're getting resistance at the process or functional level, think about how you can argue the importance of your ideas to larger company strategy, goals, and risks. Share stories of how following a certain audit recommendation not only improves the department but also contributes to the greater good of the organizations mission, or a certain strategic goals.
The Only Way to Get the Best of an Argument is to Avoid It: No arguing, period. Whenever faced with person who is clearly not in a receptive mindset, just sit back and listen, nod, and show you understand. It’s just not the time for influence. Use it to learn, and show genuine interest. Come back at another time. They will probably thank you for it.
If You Are Wrong, Admit It Quickly and Emphatically: Again, no pride. You are smart. Because you're smart, you can recognize when and why you are wrong. And when you know that, admit it. Thank the person who taught you what’s right. Remember, a key part of influence is building rapport, a common understanding, a partnership, a collective purpose. In such an environment, admitting wrongs should be easy. Admit it and move on. Very simple: “ahhh, thanks, I didn’t see that. I understand your view. What if we did something like……..”. Boom, you're already moving towards a good outcome.
Phew! Lots of principles of influence, and different kinds. Some are more foundational, good for creating an atmosphere conducive to influence. Others are more active, require the right words at the right time that set context, relevance, and vision for your ideas (TELL STORIES). And then there are principles that can help you navigate challenges in your influence campaign.
Print this out and read it from time to time. Use it to plan your years, your quarters, your months, weeks, and days. Use them to motivate your team. Use it to get budget for your plan. Use it to get a vendor to improve their service. Use it to land clients. Think about significant problems which are averse to change, and strategically apply it. Pick 1 principle and apply it in your next meeting, see if it has an impact. I trust it will be useful.